Dear, Kelsey
I’m not good at wording everything properly on the spot, I’m always a fumblemouth.
I first of all, want to apologize for the ways I’ve made you feel over the last couple of months.
I’ve been a real ass hole, and I haven’t been everything I told you I would be.
the night this started, you said I was probably fucking her. I became right defensive and said ‘fuck you.’ When really what I should’ve been saying was that you know you are the one for me, and that I love you more than anything in the world. I should’ve listened to you, and felt that you were hurt. I cared more about my own image than how you felt, and that’s not what a relationship is about. I don’t cuddle you enough. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I can’t believe what I was taking for granted. I miss the way you fit perfectly in my arms. I miss your smell. I miss the click noises you make in your sleep. I miss kissing your neck or cheek every morning.
I miss your smile, nothing compares to seeing you smile. I miss your hands, how soft they feel inside mine. Slow dancing to no music at all, just because I like to dance with you.
I promise to be a better lover. No more bull shit. I promise the love and support you need, and desire. I don’t want to be with anyone else. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.
In all the bull shit that’s happened, and in how fucked up it all is, and is making us feel;
I still adore every little bit of you. I still need to be the one who takes care of you, who gives you everything you want and more. To be the man that you would want to spend the rest of your life with. To grow old and die with you. I would marry you, whether you wanted to sign a piece of paper or not. Spiritual or legal. doesn’t matter.
I don’t play Thesis Pieces enough, and I’m sorry about that, it should always be at the top of my list. I should be gazing into your eyes the whole time I play, because you’re my inspiration to want to do something better. But not just do something better, but to experience something better, with you. Whatever we may decide to do, together.
“There is no other fish in this sea for me. None so bright and beautiful.
None so perfect for me.”
